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Episode #1: "No Need for New Arrivals!"
By Joseph C. McKenzie



NOTE: All characters original to the "Tenchi-Muyo! TV1" series portrayed in this story are the sole property of AIC and Pioneer Animation. Any appearance of them in actual life is purely coincidental. Tenchi-Muyo! material and paraphernalia listed within is Copyright Pioneer Animation 1997 (c). Kyoto Minamoto, Muriyaki Kushiragi, Chisako, Chi-Ohki, and all other related characters are the sole property of R&C Books and appear through permission from R&C Books.

Questions? Comments? Ideas? If you have any questions about where the series is going or who is who and where they came from or what they can do, contact the writers of this series at: & .

They both would like to hear from readers.

No Need For New Arrivals!

It's a late, stormy evening that finds Ayeka at her bedroom window, watching the rain patter down against the glass pane. She begins to shift away from the cloudy sky to contemplate something other than the adverse weather when a diminutive sheen of light catches the corner of her eye.

She looks again, assuring herself that it was just an optical illusion. She squints her crimson eyes and presses her face against the cool pane of glass. Nothing. She smirks, standing up and straightening her kimono. She is just about to turn away when that flash of light occurs again. Having seen it full well, she presses her face against the glass once more.

This time, she sights it. However, this reflection is much more than a cosmic flare. Much to Ayeka's horror, the shiny object has become a fiery ball hurtling towards the westerly hills. She stops for a moment to contemplate the celestial beauty of the object until she sees what looks like a missile flailing towards the very room she's in. Shrieking, she grabs up the only thing she has to protect her, her purse. She is cringing behind it when the fiery flare strikes the glass and dissipates as if it were nothing more than a water balloon.

Ayeka risks a peek from behind her purse to discover the absence of the flare and plasters herself up against the window once again. After a few seconds observation, it becomes apparent that this comet is going to strike ground in the next few seconds. She darts from her room and begins to descend the three flights of stairs as rapidly as her legs will carry her.

This comes as no comfort for she never reaches the ground floor. At this moment, the comet streaks overhead and collides with the mountains west of the shrine. The tremor generated by this impact casts Ayeka down the two flights of stairs and deposits her on top of Nobuyuki.

"Miss Ayeka?!" Nobuyuki is spread eagle on the floor and Ayeka's face is placed quite neatly between his legs. "My, aren't we frisky tonight?"

Ayeka does not remain around to hear the rest of Nobuyuki's sentence. She up and pulling her shoes on.

Meanwhile, at the crash site, what had hit ground was in fact, not a comet, but a large spaceship. Moments after the impact site has cooled, the spaceship is enveloped in a white haze that swirls around into the form of a beautiful, naked, young woman. The only item on her person is a gold collar, laced with several exotic gems.

Ayeka is the first to the crash site and is astounded by the sight of the unconscious, naked woman. She kneels beside her and reaches out to unsnap the collar from around the woman's neck. Just as her hands touch the smooth cool surface of the collar, the woman's eyes snap open. Before Ayeka can respond, the woman is to her feet and holding an orange lightsword a mere inch from her neck. "Who are you?!" she growls, tracing the crackling blade up and down Ayeka's neck.

"I am Ayeka, First Crown Princess of Jurai."

A smirk forms on the face of her assailant. "A crown princess of Jurai, how ironic that you should be on this backwater planet." She exudes a small chortle before continuing. "What's a Juraian princess doing out this far from the protection of her system's shielding? After all, shouldn't you be at home in you royal little bed? It's way past all little princesses bedtime!"

Ayeka is infuriated by this snide remark, but retains her composure.

This unknown assailant eyes her strangely. "I've never worn the robes of royalty before."

At this, Ayeka withdraws slightly. "Wh-wh-what do you mean by that?!"

The woman smiles devilishly as she beckons at Ayeka with her finger. "Take your clothes off."

At this, Ayeka jumps back a foot. "WHAT?!" she shrieks as she continues to back away cautiously from this strange woman.

"You heard me, take your clothes off. It's raining and I'm starting to catch cold." She then releases a psyonic blast at Ayeka that neatly misses her head. "Don't try to fight me, your powers are quite useless against me."

Although warned, Ayeka launches one of her patented electric log attacks. The woman merely stands there patting her mouth as she yawns while the logs sizzle and crackle around her.

After standing unaffected for a handful of minutes, the woman then flings her energy sword at the ground in front of Ayeka's feet. The resulting explosion flings Ayeka through the air and she lands on her rump several meters away.

Realizing that she can neither attack, nor run away, Ayeka submits to the woman's demands and promptly begins to disrobe. Once her clothes are neatly placed on the ground before her, the woman immediately dresses herself in them. This is followed shortly by Ayeka being bound in a psyhonic rope of some sort and places her behind a large clump of bushes. Before leaving, she grabs Ayeka by the chin and stares at her face for a few seconds. She then presses a small, red jewel on her collar. Her body is encompassed in a blue cloud of light for a few seconds and when she emerges she is the spitting image of Ayeka. The last thing Ayeka sees before being knocked out is watching herself laugh maniacally.


By the time the pseudo-Ayeka reaches the Masaki house, dinner has already started and Tenchi is just arriving home from school. The pseudo-Ayeka wanders in aimlessly and seats herself at the dinner table. The conversation is light and mainly concerned with the small earthquake that occurred earlier that evening.

Towards the end of dinner, Ryoko finally turns to who she thinks is Ayeka and asks, "Hey, Ayeka, did you see anything before the earthquake?"

The pseudo-Ayeka remains silent as she raises another chop-stick full of rice to her mouth. After a few seconds of silence and eating she finally turns and looks at Ryoko blunt-faced. "Nothing."

Rather dumbstruck by the blatant vagueness of her response, Ryoko remains staring at this Ayeka, her mouth hanging wide open. "You know, it isn't very polite to sit with your mouth hanging open while another is eating," she smirks as she continues to shovel the rice into her mouth.

Ryoko finally finds the gall to say something. "Nothing? What do you mean by nothing? Nothing, as in you didn't see anything, or nothing, as in you did seeing anything out of the ordinary or nothin'--"

Before Ryoko can say anything more, she is snatched up by the scruff of the neck and hoisted high in the air. "Listen, you pathetic bitch, I'm getting really sick of you bugging me while I try and eat! Now, shut up!"

This slip up has torn a gaping hole in her facade. In seconds the entire group is up and at arms. Tenchi is the first to speak. "Who are you?"

The pseudo-Ayeka smirks. "If you want to know, why don't you try and find out?" In this woman's hand a crackling ball of orange energy forms. She squeezes her fist tight, transforming the ball into a cylindrical blade. She is about to strike when the REAL Ayeka burst through the door, carrying the bough of a tree in front of her.

Shocked by the escape of her prisoner, the Pseudo Ayeka shrieks. "How in the hell did you get free!?" The Ayeka impersonator attempts to lunge at her over the table.

Ayeka smiles. "I was fortunate that I could repel your psyonic ropes with my powers long enough to slip free of them."

Smirking, the pseudo-Ayeka reaches up and touches a spot on her neck. A second later, the guise of Ayeka melts away, revealing her true identity. Ryoko recognizes her in a second. "Muriyaki," she growls.

The woman turns toward her. "Oh, Ryoko, you remember my name, isn't that sweet. However, I never would have imagined you to go 'goody-two-shoes'. I thought you were a diehard space pirate to the end."

Ryoko glares at her. "I still haven't forgiven you for that bank heist that you left me holding the bag at."

Muriyaki smiles, then turns to look at Ayeka. "I'll deal with you later, right now, there's a princess that needs a little disciplining." She then brings her hands together and quietly mutters something to herself. Moments later, a field of translucent energy begins to revolve around her. When she suddenly spreads her hands, the field concentrates into a small spheroid between the palms of her hands. She then whirls it around once and releases this concentrated blast targeted solely at Ayeka.

Ayeka ducks and the blast eradicates most of the living room wall. "That wasn't too friendly!"

Ayeka's comment falls on deaf ears. A second volley of psyonic energy slices past her.

However, unlike the first two attacks, Muriyaki manages to corner her before she can retreat. Brining her energy sword into existence, she growls, "This time is for keeps!" She stops, however, when Tenchi flings himself in front of Ayeka.

"Please stop," he pleads. "You don't have to do this! You don't have to fight us, we're not gonna hurt you!"

Muriyaki watches him for a moment, trying to gauge the sincerity of his words. For the first time in…whoa, has it been that long? she thinks…here is someone being nice to her, someone trying to help her. Whatever else this young man is, he's for real.

She lets her hand go limp and the energy blade flickers out.

Tenchi smiles and takes her hands in his. "Don't worry, you're amongst friends."

Positively annoyed by Tenchi's sympathy for the newcomer and his little comment, Ayeka shrieks, flailing her arms in every direction, "What about me, Tenchi?! Or don't you remember, she attacked me!"

Tenchi doesn't respond, instead he helps the woman to the couch. He is about to ask her name when Ryoko wraps her arms around him, pulling him backwards.

"Don't help her, Tenchi! She's a space pirate! She'll only turn on you when you least expect it!"

Tenchi shoots a glare in her direction. "Ryoko, you're a space pirate, remember?"

She releases him and knocks the back of her wrist against her forehead. "That's right, space pirate."

Tenchi, for his part, has returned his attention to Muriyaki. "Tell me, who are you?" He asks, handing her a handkerchief to dab the tears from her eyes. Dabbing the tears from her eyes and sniffling a couple of times, she responds.

"I am Muriyaki, first princess of the Sha'lya Sha'lya and daughter of Nadia, she who was once queen of the Shifters. I crashed here when-" She cuts herself short as she recognizes the two people entering the house, Kiyone and Mihoshi.

"I hope we're in time for dinner, our patrol lasted longer than we had expec--"

Kiyone stops when she sees who Tenchi's new house guest is. A second later she has her blaster out and pointed at Muriyaki's forehead.

Muriyaki smiles. "Well, if it isn't Detective Sergeants Kiyone and Mihoshi, didn't expect to meet you two losers out here in the boon docks. What happened, the Director General reassign you two to the Minor Incident Division?"

Kiyone favors Muriyaki with a withering glare. For a few moments, her eyes flick over to Tenchi's. Muriyaki follows her gaze, and then smirks as she sees Tenchi meet Kiyone's eyes.

Well now, she thinks. So, the infamous Ice Queen of the GP has fallen in love with an Earth boy…and he's in love with her, if I read his look right. Evidently there's something special about this guy…

Aloud, she says, "I thought you said something about arresting me?"

Kiyone's glare returns. The senior detective then elbows Mihoshi and nods her head towards Muriyaki. Mihoshi then steps forward, removes what looks like two knitting needles from her jacket pocket and holds them parallel in front of her. A second later, a small holographic screen appears between the two and Mihoshi begins to dictate off the characters written on it.

"Muriyaki Kushiragi, you are under arrest for violation of twenty-four laws of the Galaxy Federation, including assault and battery, grand theft spaceship, breaking and entering, extortion..."

Kiyone signals for Mihoshi to stop and then graces Muriyaki with a cynical smile. "I don't suppose Mihoshi needs to read the rest."

Muriyaki looks at Kiyone with a very strange expression--one of sympathy. When she speaks, it's more with sad pity than anger. "No, Detective, you've already said more than enough."

However, before Kiyone can say anything else Muriyaki speaks again. "Never mind that I was under the sway of an evil, evil man. Never mind that my innocence and naivet? led me to trust the wrong person." She then manages a small, sad smile. "I am ready to go whenever you are, Detective."

This is too much for the gentle-hearted, if extremely gullible, Mihoshi, and the desired effect is achieved. Mihoshi puts away her gun and throws herself at Kiyone's feet. "Ki-yo-ne! We can't do this! She was an innocent victim of circumstances!" Kiyone glares laser bolts in her partner's direction.

However, at this moment, the jeweled collar around Muriyaki's neck start beeping. She looks down at it and then depresses a bright, blue jewel on it.

"...So, he's almost here."


Far out in the reaches of our star system appears a large ship, space station-like in design, with five cylindrical saucers extending away from a central one twice there size, laid out in a five point star formation. Its hull is a dark olive drab, smudged with a slight spot of gray. Each saucer is domed in a non-transparent teal material. Pinnacled on top each saucer is a T.V station-like antenna. On this is three red lights that blink on and off periodically.

As the ship moves stealthily towards Earth, the saucers slowly rotate around the central hub, acting like giant inertia weights. The bridge is a shadowy, metallic looking place, bathed in a dim, eerie light that seems to have no origin point. In the very center of this somber room is the sole control mechanism for the entire station. A claymore-like sword, though bigger and much more ornate, is embedded in the floor, hilt up. Float in front of the upturned hilt are three holographic computers, much like the one Washu uses. Hovering before these are two smaller holographic objects that bear a striking resemblance to track balls.

The pilot of this massive ship is a tall, stocky man with longish forest-green hair pulled into two braids running parallel to his face and in a long tail running down his back. His brass-colored eyes glow fiendishly as they survey the images on the screen and the small red dot indicating Muriyaki's position. His hands suddenly go to work typing mechanically on the floating keyboards. Very shortly there is a long line of characters strewn across the three screens. In a diabolical, bass voice, he speaks.

"Chisako, calculate coordinates for an atmospheric insertion and commence fold." The ship responds in a feminine-sounding voice informing her master that the requested actions are being carried out. The rotation speed of saucers circling the central hub suddenly accelerates. The outside hull begins to spark as the saucers continue to accelerate until their motion is a dizzy blur. Massive arcs of energy are coruscating across the hull and in a few seconds the station vanishes, leaving no trace of its existence.

For the past twenty minutes Tenchi has been badgering Muriyaki with the same question, but still receiving no response.

"Who's almost here?!" asks Tenchi as he watches Kiyone and Mihoshi exchange weary glances. He and Kiyone had shared several more glances and Muriyaki had caught each one. They are in love…I just don't think either one knows that the other loves him or her back. Maybe if I did Kiyone a favor here, she'd be likelier to go easy on me…

Kiyone is about to answer Tenchi's question when the house begins to vibrate violently. Scared by the eerie sensation being exuded by Muriyaki and the unknown cause of the rumbling, the group quickly files outside. When they look up into the night sky, their fears become intensified.

In the sky several kilometers above Tenchi's house, the form of a giant space station begins to appear. When the station finally solidifies, a large, green ball of energy appears outside of it and floats to the ground. A second later, the silhouette of a person emerges from within it. When this body exits the spheroid, the silhouette transforms into the full image of a man.

This gentleman has longish-green hair tied back in a loose ponytail, and is clad in a dark brown hooded cape, a light gray tunic, with a slightly darker shade of gray trousers and a pair of mahogany boots. In the scabbard draped across his left hip is an ornate sword, jewels encrusted in the hilt and all the other fancies that pertain to an illustrious sword of that type. In spite of its decorativeness, there is no doubt that this thing is fully functional. This man exudes an aura of confidence, perhaps a little arrogance, yet, somehow that kind of person that you hate to love, but love to hate.

He cracks a smile as he walks over to his audience, then takes in the scene laid before him and after careful consideration exclaims, "By any chance would you have an extra place at dinner?"

Kiyone whips out her pistol and trains it on the newcomer's head while Mihoshi shakily covers Muriyaki. "It's you. What the hell are you doing on this planet?"

The newcomer fires a ten-cent smile in Kiyone's direction and then turns back to face Tenchi. "I'll talk, after I've eaten."

Thirty minutes later, after this unwelcome newcomer has filled his stomach with several bowls of beef and rice, he exudes a healthy burp and turns to speak to Kiyone.

"Alright, Sergeant, you obviously know who I am, but I don't think everyone else here does, so I'll introduce myself." He stands and bows. "My name is Kyoto Minamoto, the universe’s most wanted space pirate. I' m sure the GP's list of A1-class criminals has my name somewhere on it. After all, everyone is out to get me and so far no one has even succeeded in discovering my favorite hiding place. That sap of a bounty hunter Nagi is so incompetent, she attacked what she thought was my ship and ended up destroying a GP observation satellite. So, Sergeant, I suppose that you will want to cart me off to jail. Ah, the dream that every new officer has after fresh out of the academy. Many have tried and all have failed miserably or--" he pauses to release a chortle, then presses on "--have found themselves in an early grave."

Kiyone shakes her head. "I should have known you'd show up sooner or later. After all, you wouldn't give up your most prized possession, the last living Shifter."

Kyoto shrugs his shoulders. "What can I say? I guess I'm just protective of my stuff." He then refocuses his gaze on the original purpose for his arrival. "Muriyaki, it's time to go."

He is about to stand up and bid them all a good-evening when Ryoko enters the room. "Hey, what's all this yelling, I can't sleep!" Kyoto turns around to look at her and realizes exactly who it is. "Well, if it isn't the love of my life, the space pirate Ryoko! It's been a long time since we last crossed paths."

Ryoko realizes in a split second who is addressing her and recoils in disgust.

"Yuck! Not you! I thought I ditched you years ago in that one bar. Don't tell me you've been following me all across the universe!"

Kyoto smiles coyly. "Nope, however, I didn't think that you still had affections for me. How sweet!"

Ryoko makes the up-chuck gesture in Kyoto's direction.

"Now, where did we first meet? Oh, yes, it was at that one ritzy hotel where you were working as a maid and if my memory serves me right, the young princess Ayeka was rooming there as well. In the suite down the hall from mine. I had changed my appearance to that of a pompous, wealthy old lawyer. I first met you when you came to change the sheets in my room and--"

Ryoko clamps her hands over Kyoto's mouth. "You don't need to tell them about what happened next!"

However, she finds herself grasping nothing. Kyoto is chortling. "What, about how I got you drunk and then we--"

This time, Ayeka cuts him short. "In case you forgot, we do have young ears in here who do not need to hear your scandalous stories. What you two did that evening was absolutely repulsive. I wasn't able to get any sleep with all the noise you made!"

Kyoto smiles gently, "Well, for the sake of virgin ears, I won't say anything more." He digs a hand into his pocket for a second, then finally produces a small, black velvet box.

It swings open, allowing a large fancifully detailed diamond solitaire ring to glimmer from inside of its case. "I still love you."

Ryoko turns away in disgust. "Don't be pathetic. Besides, I've got someone else." She then wraps her arm around Tenchi's neck. He shoots her a sideways glare.

Kyoto smiles, approvingly. "You have a nice choice in men. I can see that he is strong on the inside. I would enjoy challenging him, but the hour has grown too late for that sort of thing." He then teleports himself up next to Ryoko and pecks her on the cheek. "Just remember all the good times...." He then gestures to Muriyaki that it is to leave and she promptly rises from the table. Then, simultaneously they both teleport. Once they are gone the group releases a large sigh of relief.

It is early the next morning. We find ourselves inside Washu's lab. Washu is sound asleep on her little floating computer. A continuous beeping finally awakens her from her slumber. After analyzing the information the computer has been beeping at her the entire evening, she leaps to her feet and races out her lab's door. The first person she sees is Nobuyuki, who this morning is making the breakfast.

"Good Morning, Professor." The voice she hears is not one she hoped to hear again. When she turns around, she finds herself face to chest with her worst nightmare.

"Oh, it's you." she moans.

Kyoto flashes a cheerful smile at her and says, "I haven't seen you since you were kicked out of the Academy. Oh, and by the way, all those nasty things they said about your inventions, they were all wrong. I happened to prove your work over the years, Of course, since you were.... wherever you were....I had to take all the credit for it, but still." The temperature in the room drops several degrees while Washu's temper raises several notches.

"You took credit for my work! How could you! You were my prize pupil, and the first thing I taught you was to never take credit for something you didn't do!"

Kyoto smiles, then says, "Well, times called for a different set of rules." He then quietly backsteps his way away from the already pissed Washu. He then disappears and reappears up next to the sleeping Ryoko. When she rolls over in bed she comes face to face with Kyoto. The remainder of the household is awakened when they hear her scream. The group of weary people gathers downstairs as Kyoto crawls alongside Ryoko on his knees proposing to her over and over again.

"Alright, Kyoto, I've had just about enough of your childish pranks! If you do not cease and desist, I shall personally contact the Jurai military and have them haul your butt off to jail!"

At this moment, Kyoto transforms into the image of Mihoshi. "You shouldn't threaten a Galaxy Police officer, that's a serious offense!"

The ever-vigilant Mihoshi storms up to her imitator and says, "Hey, don't imitate me! Imitating an officer of the Galaxy Police is a serious offense!"

Smirking, Kyoto suddenly shifts into the form of Kiyone. "You could be brought up on harassment charges, Ayeka." He finally returns to his original form and flops down on the couch. "Go right ahead, Ayeka, I've always wanted a chance to destroy Jurai's defense forces. That would it make it considerably easier for me to jaunt down to the surface and pick up a couple of odds and ends." This statement has little effect on Ayeka, except to infuriate her further and drive he from the room.

Sasami, the ever-watchful mediator of peace, turns to Kyoto. "That wasn't too bright, now she's gone to contact the army!"

Kyoto smiles. "Doesn't matter, by the time that the fleet would have reached Earth I could be clear on the other side of the galaxy." Kyoto rises from his seat. "Well, it's been fun, but I really must be going, I dearly hate having battles while I'm still on the ground." He disappears for a second, but reappears a moment later behind Ryoko. "On second thought, I think I have enough time to give you all a quick tour of my space station." Before anyone can object, Kyoto removes his sword from it's sheath and holds it erect above his head. A second later, the group is beamed aboard the giant station.


"Welcome all! My name is Shari and I'm you tour guide today!" When they first regain their bearings the group finds that Kyoto has transformed himself into the image of a young, attractive looking woman clad in a short, tight fitting tour guide's outfit.

The interior of the station seems very comfortable to Sasami and Ayeka. That's probably because to a large extent it resembles one of the tree groves on Jurai. In fact, some of the trees planted in this large, park-like setting are Jurai trees. Kyoto is very proud of his pride and joy space station and while he's conducting a tour, Nobuyuki sneaks off, having heard the sound of female voices and water. The results of Nobuyuki's exploration have brought him to a lake-type area where literally hundreds of beautiful, young women are frolicking naked in the water. Needless to say, this sight pleases Nobuyuki. So, he does the most logical thing he can think of: jump in the lake with them.

Having never encountered any other men besides Kyoto before, well, naturally, they freak out. Focusing a burst of energy similar to the kind that Ryoko would generate, they blow Nobuyuki out of the water and send him sailing over the tree line far off into the distance. It is at this moment Kyoto rounds the corner continuing his tour guide act.

"...And around this corner we have- Oh, Nobuyuki, how did you get here?" He reaches down and grasping Nobuyuki by the belt hoists him out of a deep depression in the ground. "Now, if you’ll excuse me for a minute." Kyoto then disappears behind the bushes and one can hear his voice mixed in with multiple female voices. He seems to be telling them not to be afraid. He then reappears from behind the bushes and motions to his tour group.

"Kiyone, if I remember correctly, you said yesterday that Muriyaki was the last of the shifters. Here is a little surprise for you." He then leads them around the bushes and on the beach, in the water, and all sort of loosely grouped together are hundreds of beautiful young, naked women. They smile shyly, a few wave, and one or two even say hi. Nobuyuki’s jaw is still dragging on the ground, Tenchi is blushing furiously and turning away from the spectacle, and Yosho greets this with his usual calm.

The reaction of the girls is somewhat more negative.

Ayeka openly states, "How distasteful!"

Ryoko raises an eyebrow. "What are you? Some kind of white slave trader?"

Kiyone rests her hand on the butt of her gun. "Kyoto, I could add solicitation to your charges. Running a brothel without a license. You’d pay hefty fines for this!" Kyoto laughs out loud, mockingly. "Yeah, right! And as if you could file a report that headquarters would even believe, after all, you’re partners with Mihoshi, remember?!"

Kyoto then gestures towards the women. "Besides, they live like this, just ask their mother." He then gestures towards Muriyaki who is in a similar mode of dress.

It is at this moment that Mihoshi asks the obvious question with the obvious answer. "But, if she’s their mother, who’s their father?"

Of course everyone knows the answer before Kyoto can even open his mouth. However, he answers nevertheless. "That, would be me." He then gestures towards them. "Would you care to join them? They look very comfortable like this."

"Alright!" Mihoshi starts to undress and head for the beach, but is held back by Kiyone and at that Kyoto smiles. "Jealous? Or do you quite literally have nothing to hide?"

The look on Kiyone’s face becomes that of anytime that Mihoshi really fucks something up.

Kyoto comes up behind her. "Here, let me help you."

"Hey!" yells Tenchi. "Leave her a--"

Kiyone is already defending herself, however. Her reaction to Kyoto's actions is a swift kick to his groin.

He dances around clutching his testicles until he finally collapses in the lake. However, when he stands up, he is merely grinning. And the strangeness of his expression is enough to delay the reaction of what he is about to do: a psyonic blast that aims to remove whoever’s clothing that it is targeted at.

However, Kiyone ducks and this happens to hit Ryoko. When Kyoto looks up to see the fruits of his labors, he is pleased. In a flash Kyoto is behind Ryoko and his hands are clutching her breasts. How very sporting of him to cover them up. "These are so nice and soft!"

Now he is the recipient of yet another blow to his groin (no pun intended). He slumps to the ground once again. This time it takes him several minutes to regain his composure.

When he finally does, Muriyaki is at his side helping him to his feet. "You know, you guys look like you could use a vacation." He then makes a sweep of his hand. A moment later a mind generated wind lifts the group from where they were standing and deposits them in the lukewarm water of the lake. He then climbs the nearest tree and does a belly flop in a second later. He lands on Ryoko, only to be forcibly shoved under the surface of the water by her. He is up and dashing after her a second later spouting his affections or what he assumes are affections, they may just be cheap come-on lines.

Meanwhile, Tenchi, ever the gentleman, is helping the ladies out of the pool as best he can. The native girls, however, seem intent on keeping him in the water. As you would expect, this does not sit very well with Ayeka, who starts swatting at them and they start swatting back out of self-defense....

Pretty soon, there is a full fledged wet T-shirt catfight.

Tenchi is about to appeal for Kyoto’s assistance, but finds that Kyoto is in the persona of a lifeguard and seated atop a lifeguard’s chair clad in red trunks. Eyeing the current situation, he stands to his feet. "That’s not fair!" A second later, a monstrous column of water is sprouting out of the lake just to the left of Ayeka. In an instant the column crashes down hard upon Ayeka, burying her several inches into the sandy beach. He then gestures to Ayeka. "However, that’s funny!" He then adds, "You may proceed."

Tenchi eyes Kyoto and then responds with a trademark American gesture. All of a sudden, the form of Tenchi's grandfather replaces lifeguard Kyoto. "Tenchi, never flip off your grandfather!"

A second later, one of Ryoko’s psyonic blasts neatly arcs past his head. Kyoto quickly resumes his playful, S.O.B self. "Oooh, I didn’t know you cared!" He hurls himself off of his lifeguard’s chair, which somehow stayed static during his sporadic changes and happens to land on Ryoko.

Kiyone and Mihoshi have finally managed to drag themselves from the lake and the grasp of many a native girl. Kiyone is dripping wet and mad, while Mihoshi is bawling about her pink sweater.

It is at this moment the distant chimes of a clock bang out the hour.

Kyoto checks his watch and then changes back to his normal self. "Okay, party time’s over, everybody out of the pool!"

The water in the lake begins to churn and a second later a reversed whirlpool spits out everyone who was still in the pool and sends them careening across the landscape. Kyoto floats down aside Ayeka, laughing big belly laughs. She is pulling her wet and disheveled kimono closer to her body by the second. Kyoto looks around at the group amusedly.

"Boy, I haven’t had this much fun on earth in a long time! I think I’m going to hang around with guys for a while!" He then floats off into the groves of trees, laughing all the way.

The group’s eyes follow him until he’s out of sight and earshot. Tenchi’s head droops, wearily. "Oh, boy." Ryoko crawls up next to him. "Tenchi, remember the tale of the goblin?" He nods his head, sadly.

Ayeka finishes the sentence. "Lord Tenchi, I must say that he is much worse than any goblin or demon in any legend."

Nobuyuki clamps a hand down on his son’s shoulder. "I don’t know, I think I’m going to kind of like having him around. Especially his lady friend. It’ll bring new life to this tired, old family."

"Nobuyuki, when will you ever learn. Space pirates are bad ne--"

Yosho does have a chance to finish his sentence.

Kiyone finishes it for him. "But, having the most wanted criminal in the universe living with you is even worse!"

With this, the group issues a collective groan.




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